A business idea

I'm too lazy to start this, but you should take this idea and run.  Syd and I said years ago that what the average office needs is way more puppies.  What the world needs is a business that will bring a basket of puppies to offices, and the workers can play with them for an hour or so to relieve stress and build camaraderie.  The puppies would be pups in need of good homes and be available for adoption.

Seriously, how great would it be if this showed up in your sad little cubicle?!

For an extra fee, the business would also bring ice cream sundaes. 

Back to work in my critter and dessert free cube now...

Breakout DNC star: Carina Castro!

My hump day has really been off to a lousy start, but my spirits have just been lifted by this fantastic little girl.  This is Carina Castro, beautiful daughter of San Antonio mayor Julian Castro.  While watching her daddy speak at the Democratic National Convention last night, she flipped her hair with levels of grace and panache I can only dream of reaching:



Get it, girl!  Carina Victoria has inspired me.  I will now go forth and attempt to tackle my day with even a fraction of her class.

Via Buzzfeed.

Realizations

So this morning I was getting ready for work, executing a new part of my daily routine - yanking out visible gray hairs - when I had the following realizations:

I am a secretary.

I have rapidly graying hair.

This is me in a few more years:

I hope I soar to her astronomical heights!

Office supplies

How appropriate that these should arrive on Administrative Professionals Day!

I wonder who Gregg was.  Glad to know he ruled.  RIP, Gregg.

It's Administrative Professionals Day!

Here is a card for all my fellow administrative pros!

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZING! Also here is a conversation I heard a fellow member of the steno pool have with someone earlier:

SP Member: The stapler on the copier is broken, but I can just do these by hand.
Other Person: But that won't look as nice.  They won't all look the same.
SP Member: I'm confident I can staple them gracefully enough.  It'll be okay.

It's Monday again

I DISAPPROVE.

Book recommendations

What are books are you reading these days, folks? I was given a large number of books for the holidays, and I am thrilled to have a fresh, healthy stack of tomes to devour - but those may have to get put on hold so that I can check out some of these great works highlighted in Buzzfeed's recent post 'These 24 Books Have Actually Been Published.'

I am already incomparably awesome, but you might want to check out this one:


Practice makes perfect, yo!

Here's one I think I need to read straightaway - like many twenty-somethings, I've wondered what the next step in my working life might be. My sister gave me some very good advice recently. She said that no one is going to have my career as their top priority but me. I think she is right - and I think I've found just the book to help me cultivate my inner businesswoman:


I'm off to see if Craigslist has any mattresses being put out on the side of the road today I can pick up. The sky's the limit, folks!

Neck news

My lovely work colleagues continue to supply quality blog content! This time it's from pal and peer Lindsey, who alerted me to this fascinating Slate slideshow on the widest necks in the NFL. One of the highlights for me was Chiefs team member Kelly Gregg, who clearly has attempted to overcome having a somewhat feminine first name by having the world's manliest neck:


Kelly is something called a 'nose tackle,' but one look tells you he ought to become a neck tackle. Y'all mosey on over to Slate and check out all those wide ass necks!

From the neighborhood

My dear friend Leah sent me this Very Good Photo she took in the vicinity of our office just the other day:


For realz, y'all. The driveway needs love too.

You can tell this will be a good day

MR. PANCAKE CALLED AGAIN!!!!


I love you, Mr. Pancake!

HELLO THERE!

My pal Lindsey just sent me this incredible video of a delightful, friendly bear!



I hope Sam is ready to spend the evening watching this 7 seconds of bliss over and over and over!

News from the steno pool!

Here are some exciting things that have happened in the steno pool today:

1. Had to break out a fresh notebook for my to-do lists. These notebooks are actually called 'steno pads' which pleases me to no end.

2. A man called my boss. His name was Mr. Pancake.

That's it so far, but there's 2 hours left in this fine day!

It's hump day once again!

Don't let the fact that there's half the week left to go get you down. Rejoice in the fact that half of the week is behind you, and slap a smile on your face!



I just want to throw something in his mouth! Maybe a McRib? From my research, McRibs seem to be made at least partially of dog food.

Via Videogum, duh.

Overheard in the lobby

I just ran into one of my coworkers in the lobby. She is a fellow curly-haired lady. We had the following exchange.

Her: Hey, did you straighten your hair??
Me: I did! I straightened it this morning!
Her: Isn't it so much fun?
Me: It is!!
Her: Can't you just not stop running your fingers through it?
Me: I CAN'T!!!

If you have curls, you totally get this conversation. If you do not, eff you and your easy ass hair (just kidding, love you!).

Random picture day!

I realize I've been neglecting my poor blog once again, but I just do not have time to comb the interwebs for gems right now. So instead, I am going to bring you random pictures I have saved on my computer to use in blog posts that never got written. Here's one that came up when I did a Google image search for 'steno pool':


YEP!

More random pictures to come as the day wears on!

ACK!

Here is a really ugly sweatshirt that aptly describes my mental and emotional state these days:


And here is a video that was able to cut through that stress and bring a smile to my droopy maw:



Hahaha! Corgi rodeo! That's so great. Like a salve to the soul.

Via, where you can find many other adorable animal videos as well.

Friends + Internet = Betterment of the day

Stressful and harried and, if I'm being honest, kinda sad is how I'd describe this week so far. But with just half an hour left to go in what's been a particular downer of a work day, Sydney sent this glorious deposit to my LOLk*.



*LOLk = nomenclature invented by Videogum to refer to your investment portfolio of laffs.

Actual thought I just had

"Ah, nothing like a fresh pack of post it flags!"

#secretarystuff #stenopool

This was a long week!

Summer is supposed to be an easygoing season, but that is not the case in the steno pool. I've been very busy! Too busy to blog! That's just not okay, so I'm taking a break to share with you this very special clip of someone falling down - it's so special because it involves a trampoline!



OUCH! Maybe one less beer before you attempt that next time, pal!

Via Videogum

Overheard in my office

This woman from another department just came in my office to drop something off for my boss. After handling me the folder, she bent over, put her face near my stomach, and the following exchange occured:

Her: Is it in there yet?
Me: What?
Her: THE BABY!!!
Me: WHAT?!?!?!?!

I need a raise.