Some people don't care about the royal wedding

This flower girl, young Grace van Cutsem, is one such person:


Cheer up, Grace! This is a happy occasion!

The wedding of William and Catherine

...as told via text messages sent between me and Whitney this morning.

Whit: Just watched Chelsy Davy walk in. Her couture looks like it could be from the Fashion Bug. Trashy ho.
Me: HA! Just tuned in! Kate looks radiant even through the car window.
Whit: That dress is perfect. I yelled to mom "Oh my God it's Grace Kelley!"
Me: It so is.
Me: Damn, Harry looks hot!
Whit: I am crying right now. Jeez.
Me: It's like Maria from the Sound of Music!
Whit: YES. It's f*cking perfect.
Me: Oh wow. Amazing shot of the abbey from above!
Whit: I would have passed out by now. Go Kate go!
Me: Also great dress on Pippa - classic but sexy!
Whit: I JUST said to my mom, THAT is how you do a bridesmaid's dress.
Me: Now I am crying too. They look so in love.
Whit: I could never be this excited about my own wedding! Is that weird?
Whit: But I'd like a dress like that to wear around the house.
Me: Yes, it is weird. And yes, you would be this excited about your own!
Me: HA! Did you see Princess Bea's hat?!
Whit: Oh I LOVE those girls.
Me: Why are there nuns there??
Whit: Um, I think Church of England has nuns, but I don't know the rules. Henry VIII didn't change stuff when he took over, he just wanted the Pope's land.
Me: And more bitches.
Whit: Can I just say I love my mom? She broke out her wedding china for us to drink tea and eat scones upon!
Me: That is adorable!
Whit: Ugh, now I have to go do my hair. WHY didn't I take off work today?!?!
Me: Eugenie's rack looks huge! And I'm surprised you didn't.
Me: Just wear it in a ponytail!
Whit: Too short, got it cut Tuesday.
Me: You planned this poorly.
Me: Why are they back at the front again?
Whit: They have to sign the big book in the chapel of Edward the Confessor at some point.
Me: Haha, you love that part!
Whit: I love all the parts! I cried when I visited Westminster.
Me: :) The Dean's Yard is one of my fave places in London.
Whit: I'm SO sad I'm not there.
Me: Wonder if Harry is pissed he has to sit by Camilla?
Whit: I think Harry is still half-asleep.
Me: Remember his flower arrangement on Diana's casket that said 'Mummy'? Broke my heart.
Whit: I can't even think about it.
Me: THEY ARE GOING TO SIGN IT!
Me: OMG, going thru the arch into St James Park, they had about two seconds when the crowd couldn't see them and they didn't have to wave - and they held hands. SNIFFLE!
Whit: I love them.

Fin. And hopefully they live happily ever after!

The Victorian Jersey Shore

Well this is just hysterical. Actors from Broadway's current production of The Importance of Being Earnest reading actual lines from Jersey Shore.



There's at least 5 of these. I advise you to go watch them with all possible haste!

He hid his kids, he hid his wife...

...but he neglected to hide his weed! Viral video star Antoine Dodson, who educated America about the need to squirrel away your loved ones so as to avoid roving bands of rapists, has been arrested for marijuana posession. He was released in short order, no doubt due to his general fabulosity. Check out this 'do he's sporting in his mugshot!


Fierce! Many thanks to dear friend Ben for the heads up on this breaking news.

Babies: Total Jerks?

Once Sydney and I were walking along Newbury Street in Boston, having just gotten pedicures (#girlstuff). I was absolutely starving, and we came upon this youngster who had a whole can of Pringles he was munching on. I tried to catch his eye to see if he would share, but he'd have none of it. "Look at that asshole baby," I said to Syd. "He's taunting me with his Pringles." Then Sydney laughed at me because I called a baby an asshole.

Anyway, the baby in this video reminded me of that baby:



What a little twerp!

He gets by with a little help from his goose

Meet Baks and Buttons!


Baks is a boxer who was left blind after an accident. Buttons is the pet goose who helped nurse him back to health and become comfortable going out and about. He's a guide goose!

That is just effing adorable!

A magical evening... of racism

So this Mississippi wedding write up is a real zinger, y'all! This one took place in Brandon, MS last year, and it is just chock full of intricate details and white supremacy! Things start off fairly reasonably:

The bridesmaids wore formal two-piece strapless gowns of boysenberry satin with A-line skirts and ivory lace overlay bodices. The carried sandalwood fans adorned with fuschia and ivory roses.

Sounds normal enough, right? Ugly, but pretty run of the mill. THEN:

The couple exited the church to "Dixie" while the groom waved his red Ole Miss pom pom.


The couple was then whisked away from the church in a white horse drawn carriage to the beautiful historic gardens of Wisteria Hall in downtown Brandon, where the bride's parents hosted a true southern Mississippi reception.

As the buggy pulled up to the antique brick walkawy, the couple entered the gardens to "Tara's Theme" from the movie "Gone With the Wind." It was truly a fairy tale setting and a lifelong dream of the bride.


Dream big, ladies!! It's not noted in the write up, but after dinner the guests enjoyed a lively impromptu meeting of the White Citizens Council 2.0 - Insidious Racism for the 21st Century.